The Importance of Saying “No”

Setting Boundaries can sometimes be scary, especially with people we are close to or when we want to be accepted. Saying “No” is a boundary that is difficult for people for various reasons. In my life the inability to say “No” at crucial moments have caused me to remain in bondage to an individual, group, a job, or even lose respect for myself.

This video is for those who fear rejection when setting boundaries or telling people “No”. This video is also for people who experience feelings of guilt and shame or view themselves as selfish when they say ‘No”.



Are you Living in Your Daily Purpose?

recite-18ygwotI was reading a devotional today that was encouraging people to remember God has a BIG purpose for their life. After reading the devotional, I thought to myself, it is always good to be reminded of our purpose but what is a BIG purpose? Are we to differentiate between a big and little purpose? Purpose is purpose right?

This then led me to think about my own life and how I often focus purpose as an end goal and forget that purpose is a journey, everyday I am living God’s purpose. The fact that I am alive and breathing is purpose, leading to more and more purpose. Even my mistakes have a purpose, while they may not have been God’s plan, mistakes still have purpose.

You may never fully know how your life has been or is purposeful for others. I want you to know that every breath you take is for a purpose. You choose if you want to live for the goal of the Big purpose or live in the purpose of today.

How to Build Hope Through Remembrance

recite-ei9qpvRemembrance is powerful! When you remember pain, loss, rejection, or hurtful words it can potentially create negativity, fear or even a depressed mood. When the pain from the past clouds your mind, you can begin to lose focus, confidence and hope for the future.

Your remembrance of the past might be the rejection you experienced from an unhealthy relationship. The parent or care taker who was or is never satisfied with your performance. The School bully’s taunting words of “ugly”, “no one likes you”, “you will never have any friends”. The adult family member or friend who took advantage of a trusting child and was abusive, sexually, mentally, emotionally and/or physically. I could go on with more examples but hopefully you understand my point.

What You Remember is a CHOICE

However, there are also great benefits to remembrance. As I sated remembrance is powerful but you can CHOOSE to remember the positive, encouraging, transforming and life-giving moments of your life. You have the CHOICE to remember what goodness God has brought into your life. You have a CHOICE to remember the precious promises of God. A God that loves you and whose love endures forever. You can CHOOSE to remember that God looks at you with eyes of LOVE. You can CHOOSE to remember all the people who have helped you along the way, impacted your life, or who inspire you to walk in your life purpose. On the other hand, you can CHOOSE to remember the people who brought you down in life, took advantage of you and prohibited your growth. If you CHOOSE this route of remembrance, the question to ask yourself is “what purpose does this serve”?

Remembrance keeps your hope alive. When you are going through a difficult time you can remind yourself of how you journeyed through difficult times before, come through the other side, and lived to tell the tale. You maybe reading this and saying “but nothing good ever happens to me”. Well I beg to differ. if you are reading this you are blessed enough to be able to read and  have access to the internet to read this blog. You are breathing, which means something good is happening to you. You CHOOSE how you view your life. Whether it is the pain of the past, the laughter in the past, the possibilities of the future, or life lessons learned; it is your CHOICE.

My Battle with Positive Remembrance

I am not writing this because I always make a CHOICE to remember the possibilities and God’s precious promises. There are times when I am in my head about POSSIBLE failures, what people might think , and worry how I can possibly make it through. Yet when I stop to remember God’s promises, such as how much he loves me, he will never leave me nor forsake, or that he protects and watches over me, I begin to move forward and keep these truths at the forefront of my mind.

I recently completed my masters. Therefore, I am no longer a full-time student and I am looking for work. I am currently working part-time and have been concerned about paying the bills, which became overwhelming. I CHOSE to remind myself that ever since I was laid off from job in December 2012 and I have not paid a bill late and have never gone a day hungry. Since December 2012 I have not earned as much income as my last full-time job. Actually, I have not held a full-time job since that time, yet God takes care of me and I to CHOOSE to remember this when I THOUGHTS of failure and defeat occur.

How to Build Hope Through Remembrance

  • I encourage you to write down all the good things that have happened in your life that brings a smile to your face, it can even just be one thing.
  • Remember a time when you were challenged and you never thought your would make it but you did. What did it take for you to make it through?
  • What are some quotes, scriptures, mantras, advice that you can focus on and remember that will keep your hope alive and focused on the endless possibilities of the future.
  • I want you to remember that you have GREAT purpose in your life and you CHOOSE what you remember.