Thankful for the Gift of Being Single

unnamed 3I recently read a friends Facebook post about a family member being concerned that they are a 35 single female without children. In spite of the conversation she is happy being 35 without children. I totally related to her post because I am 35 and single. I have heard it all, when are you gonna have kids, why are you single, do you want children? Do you want to be married? Don’t leave it too late etc. Whilst I know people love me and are concerned I do not agree with being with someone or having kids just because of my age! I look forward to being married and having children, but I am not willingly to settle out of fear. I think we have all experienced forcing ourselves to enjoy someone’s company when you really do not like them.

Oh did I forget to mention the biological clock and the increased risk of Down Syndrome. Whilst there may be some truth to the statistics it does not mean I should make a rushed decision about a husband and having children. You chose what you want to believe and I believe God, despite the numbers. Oh by the way, the chance of having twins is higher in older women, with or without fertility treatment.

There are many things that I  am thankful for, whilst in my single season. I thankful for the opportunity to learn about myself  and develop my self-awareness. I am thankful that I can develop my relationships with family and friends. I thankful to come home and everything is the same place I left it, that gives my slight OCD comfort lol. I am thankful for peace and quiet in my home, which is important for an introvert like me. I am thankful for the opportunity to come and go when I please. I thankful that I can focus on my relationship with God and spend more time with Him. I am thankful that I can discover what is important in a relationship. I am thankful to discover what I bring to a relationship. I am thankful for the amazing travel experiences I have had throughout the world. I am thankful for relationships with people who are married, friends and family members with children that I can learn from. I am thankful for the support from my single friends in the same position as mean who are also enjoying life.  I grateful for the various people I encounter, sitting in coffee shops alone. I am thankful that I love me and spending time with me. I am thankful that I have become comfortable in my own skin and know my worth.

To the single ladies in the this same position, you have a choice to enjoy this stage of your life or worry about when you will meet your husband. I know it is difficult when you feel pressure from, family, friends, or the media but settling will only make you unhappy. Being single is a great gift  and there are many things to enjoy. Focus on what you have not what you do not have and your view will change about this season of your life.

To those of you reading this who pressure friends or family members who are single, please give them a break and let them enjoy their life and just be the best friend or family member you can. Please stop asking them if they are in a relationship or why are they single, they will let you know when the time is right.

Thanks for your time

Love Bianca

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